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Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Slack Biddy

Sorry Guys,
Blogging got away from me the last few days. Its been on the back of my mind but I didnt feel that I had enough to post.
Catching up with my best friend Teegs was AWESOME. You know you've got a true friend when its been 18 months since you've seen them and it feels like no time has passed at all. We didnt do anything spesh but we just hung out.... best time ever..... I cant wait to see her again.... love you Teegs!!
Had my weigh in and measurements done today for the gym challenge. In the past month I've lost 3.1 kilos and 12 cms. Pretty happy with that. I haven't changed too much- food is sensible and normal. Hell I've even had takeaway nights! And I'm working out 5 days a week but not to a point where I am sore constantly. It's always an hour or 45 mins of cardio. I only do weights once a week so I need to change that and do it once more a week. But I'm being realisitic and sensible. Best way to be people. Remember- it didnt take you 3 weeks to put all this weight on....
I am waiting for a call back about HECS fees for Uni. I am definately doing my Bachelor of Applied Social Science. I know I'll be great at helping others. I already do- why not get paid for it? Hahaha. I also know how to disconnect from others- not in a cold hearted way, but how to give advice and not take on board too much. I know how important this will be in talking to others with issues. I really want to help others who have weight issues. As someone who has been there/ still is to a certain degree, I know it'll come from my core.
So things are pretty great right now. No complaints. Forget guys. Really. I honestly don't have time to be screwed around be some immature guy (or pural :0P) and their issues. This is Bridgy time.

Have a think about this one guys....

"It's not what's happening to you now or what has happened in your past that determines who you become. Rather, its your decisions about what to focus on, what things mean to you, and what you're going to do about them that will determine your ultimate destiny".
-Anthony Robbins

Thursday, March 26, 2009

So.....

Date was the best of the ones I've been on...... but it was another dud....... keep pressing on and wade through the mud to get to try and score myself a keeper.... not pessimistic about this whole men thing.... learning it takes time, worth the experience and many lessons are learned....
All I can say is.... we had lunch... I put in extra money since I didnt have change... and he took that change and used it at timezone... yes.... he is 23....and he used my money at timezone.... very mature!!
Went to the gym today for personal training, I ADORE it! Although I have carpet burn on my elbows from doing army style moves on the carpet. Lol. I made a pact with myself that I would go to the gym thursday, friday and saturday.... I cant sat so I am going to sunday hopefully....
Tomorrow my bestest coolest awesomest friend Teegs is coming to see me...she moved back to Coffs (sobs) 18 months ago and I havent seen her since. I miss her everyday.... she hasnt seen me since Ive lost weight so it will be good to see her reaction! Lol. We are spending the weekend together so it'll be awesome!!! I am so so so so so crazy excited... she gets me.... shes the other me in the world...
Had the vets send me a card today.... "sorry for your loss" .... opened it as I came home from date.... tears!!!
Food is ok... Im not in diet mode... its normal shit, no junk- and if it is its minimal and a small portion. I dont crave that food anymore- I actually detest it...
I know its less banding stuff these days... but it still is all related... my life started the day I was banded... who would have thought a year ago I would be dating... who would have thought a year ago I could survive without junk food? Who would have thought that its been 6 or so months since Ive been majorly sick..... I love my band I love my band I love my band.....


Sunday, March 22, 2009

Running!!

Hey guys,

Last night I felt like total crap.... I didn't work out (slept in tisk tisk) and I had Chinese for dinner..... felt like crap this morning too. I know now that food and exercise definately relates to my confidence and moods. When I haven't worked out for a day and eaten poorly I start to feel low. Is this a good thing/a bad thing or totally normal???
So today I knew I needed to get out and get moving.... Dad and I went on a 5 km walk together... I was ahead the whole way... he caught up to me and made some smartarse comment.... so I ran.... yeap... ran..... only for a few minutes... but man I felt free.... thats something I'm definately going to do more of.... after I buy a new sports bra...lol....
Had issues eating today... pd'ed my usual tuna and light philly wrap... think I has something to do with last nights food- not too sure. Fun fun .... tuna- not so great coming up...
Back to another work week tomorrow.... yawn.... I must enquire this week about the counselling course... I also have a date/meet up on Thursday... the guy is very very nice. Good head on his shoulders, smart, funny, trust worthy (so far)..... watch this space.... (I'll probably post later in the week about how nervous I am!!!)

Friday, March 20, 2009

What To Do With My Life?

I'm unhappy and unfulfilled job wise. Yes- I know I was so focused on getting this job last year- but in actually getting it- I realised it wasn't what I thought it would be. ... I've been thinking the last few weeks what I really want to do.... I want to be able to help people- especially those who are banded and have weight issues.... So.... I decided I want to do my Bachelor of Applied Social Science (Counselling). I think I'd rock at it...... I'm good at listening to others and giving advice. I adore being able to help in any way.... thoughts?
Gym rocking- there 4-5 days a week
Food rocking..... spot on!

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Getting there...

I've had a really great day today. Woke up- checked scales and I'm 93 exactly, went to my personal training session then did some cardio, had my free endermologie consult, went and got my hair dyed brunette (apparently it looks hot hehehe) had some drinks with Nikki, and now Im home resting...
Im in the zone. Working out and eating well. Still aiming for my goal of being 85 in 7 weeks- I've got 8 kilos to go. I'll up workouts again and tighten up the food. I think its very do able. I've been losing every week for the last few so I'll keep doing what I'm doing- staying focused and I'll hopefully get there!

Monday, March 16, 2009

Meh

I cant eat a fucking thing without it getting stuck...... stress sucks.... having to put your beautiful dog down sucks.... im at a loss.....


Saturday, March 14, 2009

Sadness

I'm kinda tipsy... I don't normally drink... but felt like I needed to relax tonight.
Monday morning my 16 year old dog Skipper will be put down. He's old and needs to go to a better place.... I'm pretty much devastated....
If I'm not around its because of that....

Thursday, March 12, 2009

The Best Year Of My Life...

This time a year ago I had started my journey... I was laying in a hospital bed, in a fair amount of pain, not knowing what lay ahead of me. If I could go back and tell Old Bridget about my year in review, and how I feel about myself today.... I would say...
Sweetheart, everything will be fine. No, it will be better than fine. There won't be anymore feelings of fear, guilt, sorrow of the life you lead, worthlessness. You will be uplifted. In that first year you'll learn how to smile, to laugh, to look into the mirror and love the person starting back at you. Better yet- you will look back in the mirror and for the first time in your entire life, you will see the woman you've always wanted to see. You will learn how to walk proud, stand strong, speak your mind, not be afraid of new, exciting events or challenges. You will let go, and live. You will step outside of your box. You will respect yourself enough to say no to certain people, situations- even food.
This journey isn't purely about your body. Your internal being will reflect your outer being. You will shine from the inside out.
You will make friends, life long friends, who truly get you. Who you wouldn't have gotten through this without. You will meet people from all over the world who tell you that you've inspired them.

Words... they are words....words that do not come close the summing up my year, my new life. I really believe that I have had a very very emotional first banded year with a lot of growth. I really went from a scared little girl into a strong independant woman.
Thankyou thankyou thankyou thankyou thankyou... for reading my posts, my thoughts, my heart spilled out from a keyboard. Blogging has given me a lifeline to grab a hold of. Tonight, I'm going to go back to the start- and read from the beginning. I want to see for myself how far I've come.

So where to from here? I say- bring on my goal!! My second year of banded life will be a lot different from my first. I feel like the first year was the bricks, the foundation of myself. This year I think I'll be reaping the benefits. Getting to my goal weight wise and living the life I want to live. I'm going to write out my life list (post it of couse) and then start to cross the things I want to do off.

I saw my surgeon today for my one year follow up. I had blood tests a few weeks ago and got the results today. "Perfect" ....... wow..... first time in 7 years I havent had a medical issue. I am drug free and nothing health wise to worry about. No more insulin issues.... I'm so proud! My surgeon also asked me to speak and one of his information session nights. So May 6th I'll be in front of people who are ready to change their lives and tell them about my journey. Very exciting, a little nervy. I want to look my best for that night.... so I'm making it a goal- I've got 8 weeks.... and I want to be 85.... so that's 9 kilos..... let's see how we can go!!!

So here we go...... Year 2 begins.... I'm healthier, happier, FREAKING HOT (well getting there), more determined than ever before, fitter and loving life!!

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

So exciting!! One big sleep!

Bandiversary tomorrow!!! Yay.... wow.... what a year.... I'll post a reflection tomorrow :0)

Monday, March 9, 2009

WOOHOO!!

YAY!!!
I've lost 2 kilos this week!!! Back down to 94.1......... I'm so motivated and focused... finally after months its coming off and my hard work is seeing results!!

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Eyes To The Front

Howdy,
So my ankle was being a cow from when I did it Thursday until last night. Aching etc. It was very sore on Friday so I didnt go to the gym after work. But cut to Friday night I couldnt sit still so I took some panadol and strapped it up. I walked for an hour on the treadmill at home.
Got up Saturday morning and went to the gym also for an hour.
Today I woke up a little sore. I was planning on the gym but I've decided I'll just use the treadmill tonight for an hour.
This weeks exercise has been:
Monday- nil
Tuesday- 1 hr cardio
Wednesday- nil
Thursday- pt session (next week will go in earlier to do cardio beforehand)
Friday- 1 hr cardio
Saturday- 1 hr cardio
Sunday- 1 hr cardio
Can you tell? I'm totally in the zone!!! Its weird..... but goooood!
Food is great. No issues in making healthy food choices. Usually on weekends I'd be a little "naughty" and get crap. But I now say " I respect my body and myself too much to eat that."
I earnt 175 points at the gym last week for the 12 week challenge. Apparently thats good. Lol. My aim is to be above that every week now :0)
Hope you all had a lovely weekend.... I'm noticing that a lot of people are having troubles in their lives at the moment. I've spent this weekend listening and thinking about it. Trying not to take it on board. The moment I do that I soak up the negativity and it effects my moods.
Thursday is my bandiversary.... I am really looking forward to it. It'll be an emotional day for me (yeah, I'm a thinker.....). I am SO PROUD of myself. I have a busy day with my PT sesh in the morning (i think thats pretty monumental to do it that day because thats not something I would have done a year ago), getting my hair done (pictures will follow I promise!!) and seeing my surgeon for my one year follow up!
Anywho... I shall post in a few days to let you know how I am going with the challenge and to give you my 1 year bandiversary recap!

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Chin Up

I'm really not having much luck! After the $810 car issue on Monday, the sick dog.... I thought maybe that things would improve! However not so. I have a cold and as I was walking out of the gym after my first PT session I TWISTED MY ANKLE!!!! Lmao!!!! Its funny (and sore!).....
The session was great. Fairly easy however. First one so she was easy on me! Next week I'll do half an hr cardio beforehand as well...
So gym going well. Seem to be on track with it. Hopefully my ankle feels better tomorrow and I get to the gym after work. I really wanna give my all to this.
I've become complacent. Stuggling to lose. Im scared of being under 90, I know that. But I figure, how about I try it and see how I feel? Lol. The goal is under 90 stat! Haha! If all I can do is get under 90 in this 12 week challenge I'll be happy.
I think I gained some of my positivity back today. I don't know what it was. But something just clicked....
Food is good. I admit, I went out for afternoon tea with some friends and had two skim hot chocolates. No cakes though. I resisted....
The key is exercise my friends.... and I WILL wake up tomorrow and my ankle will be fine... and I will get to the gym for an hrs cardio!!!!
Thinking of you Angie. Yay for being on the other side!!! xoxo

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Whoa

20 003 hits to my blog? Crazyness!!!!!
So we are on Day 2 of the 12 week challenge. Last night I went and had the info sesh- learnt about the next 12 weeks an what it intails. I'll have one PT session a week, one group PT session a week, as many classes as I can fit in, Slim program (its the food side of it, daily food diary- they have a food system where you count the food groups you eat.... I'll give it a crack and see if it shakes things up a little and kick this weight loss boat back into the water). We get weighed in weekly and measured monthly. We had photos taken also. So as you can tell its hardcore. I may even be there 6-7 days a week. Its a points system- the more times you are there and participating- the more points you get and the bigger the chance of winning the $ 10 000. The money means shit to me... if I can crack under 90 I'll be a fucking happy chappy!!

Havent posted in a few days. Felt a little low. Had life drama. Dog is dying and car broke down. Needs a new gear box. And with no money its brilliant. Thankfully my amazing parents are paying for it and Im paying them back!!
Very late- very tired. I shall post soon. I'm exhausted- this challenge is gonna get real results Im telling you now!

Sunday, March 1, 2009

And So It Begins...

Hey guys,

So I haven't worked out in 5 days. Monthly motherfucker arrived and I'm elephant worthy. Food hasn't been crash hot either..... so I've not blogged because I was rocking everything so hard and didn't want to have a negative post fucking that all up.
Tomorrow is very exciting.... tomorrow I start my 12 week challenge!! I am ready to give it my all. I have to go and meet everyone and get a low down tomorrow, so there won't be any extreme work outs just yet. I will go workout before the meeting though. 5 days is a long time!! My body feels like mush!
My first ever bandiversary is coming up in a matter of days!! Whoa!! Crazyness.... this means this time last year I was on opti- yuk. Dreaming of the new me. And cut to a year later, the new Bridget writing about this is doing pretty darn well if you ask me. Sometimes Im a little too hard on myself and think I should have done better. That I should be at my goal. But you know what.... I dont want this to end. I don't want there to be an "end point" of this journey. So I'm not going to think of it like that.... I am having such an amazing time learning about myself and watching the new love of my body....that won't end when I see a certain number on the scales or fit into a certain size of pants. So I've decided- my weight won't end my journey.... it will take me on another road... do u get what I am trying to say? Its hard to put all these huge explosive thoughts here. I couldnt articulate them to have anywhere near the signifcance that they have in my life.... but lets leave this kinda babble for bandiversary day.... lol.....
I am a little hesitant however about this second phrase of my journey. I am stuck on a weight I havent been able to get past in years. I KNOW that has significance. I am doing this challenge to fight that.... so expect some highly emotional posts in the following weeks. I am nervous about losing more weight..... I don't know that Bridget.... thats a daunting thing. But I want it.....
Bring it. Tomorrow it begins..... phase two- the unknown!