Take a Bow

Troches are out.

In the last week you guys have seen how horrible my band has been acting. It's HAS to be because of them. Plus I feel nothing. I don't really feel like I have any emotion. Apart from wanting to bawl my eyes out at every moment of the day. I went on them to make my skin better, he's given me a cream for that. So I will continue to use the cream and ditch the troches. I have been doing reading also and they are looked upon with great support. Plus my weight has gone from losing a kilo a week to actually gaining.

Todays goal results:
1- yes! did 30 mins on treadmill!
2- Yeap! Drank over 1.5 L water today
3- Success! I didn't go near the scales!

Will post again tomorrow with news on my weekly goals.
Hoping by tomorrow or Tuesday I am feeling back to my old self. I hate this lifeless Bridget.

-skinny "troches suck ass" biddy :0)

It's On!!

Inspired by Sami and Gabrielle, I've decided in order to shift this weight (I'm stuck on 103) I need to set mini goals. I'm going to steal the idea off the girls and set them for each week. I think its a brilliant idea and excellent motivator. I want so so so so bad to be under 100 for my 21st. Something seems to want to test me since I've so far had an easy ride. Something wants to see what I am really made of. Every time in the past I've set goals I've never been able to make them. Well not this time. No more sitting by whilst the scales stay the same. Time to kick my butt into the next gear.

This weeks mini goal is:
* At least 4 work out this week lasting 30 mins or more
* Drink at least 1.5 Litres of water a day
* Do NOT look at scales until next Friday when at dietician. (I was 105 on theres so need to be under this then)

So there are the three goals for the week.
In hormonal news, heres whats new with the troches. The troches are the things that the specialist gave me to help correct hormones and reduce fluid retention, acne and weight. So far I have noticed a huge improvement with my skin. As for the weight, well its actually something I am really going to have to pay attention too. Since being on troches I have lost restriction so will have to make sure I dont put anything on. Fluid retention still there. Had a horribly hormonal day. Cried a bit, frowned a bit, and moped around. I cannot sleep as you are probably aware because of such late post. A part of the wonderful PCOS. Dr has given me progesterone tablets to help me sleep as it is only at certain parts of my cycle I cannot. I was a little upset today when my stomach doubled in size and I had to waddle around looking like I was 8 month pregnant. I thought that this was meant to be fixed?? Maybe I am asking too much after only starting them a week ago. It's just that I so want this to work. If it doesn't I feel like I am totally going to give up.

8 days until next fill! Cannot wait! Will be asking for a big one this time around! Always gone for little ones to be safe but I can tell mumma needs a big one! Lol.
I was thinking today about this blog. I was thinking about how disconnected I feel from it. I think that I have more success when I am writing about whats happening and am able to decompress. Its such a support for me. So maybe that should be another goal of mine, to lean on blog again for support.

Off to attempt to get some sleep. Tomorrow consists of tafe work, vaccuming, sleep in, 30 mins on treadmill and preschool programming. Joy joy joy!

-skinny "re-motivated" biddy :0)

Ok Barbie, Stop With the Moods!

I swear my band has a mind of her own! The last week has been really confusing with reflux,nausea, being starving and now back to restriction!! I cannot make any sense of it. I think I'm back to taking one day at a time.
Went for a 3 km walk yesterday, was going to do a 5 km but I forgot to put bandaids on my little toes and ended up with blisters. I also played netball last night and.................................................. WE WON!!!! Yay! I felt like I had a lot more energy and stamina during this game. I definately want to do netball twice a week next season. It's just a matter of putting a team together!
Food wise yesterday
L- 2 fish portions and 3 cruskits
D- thai sweet chilli chicken wrap

After the wrap I felt sick. I wanted to throw it up. It was too much. I was pretty confused about why I could eat so much for lunch and not for dinner. But oh well! I've just had a cup of noodles and I am so crazy full. I'm going to have to get my head back to small portions again. I few days of larger ones and I'm all outta whack.

No 5 km walk today, a little sore. Thinking of hitting the treadmill later today however. I want to shift these kilos and get under 100. I am so close and I don't want it to take too long!

Have a super weekend guys.

-skinny "determind yet a little confused" biddy :0)

Aha!!

Ok, so I think I've worked it out. All these crazy symptoms started on Saturday/Sunday. Well I started the troches on Friday! Its hormonal! I have no restriction due to hormones! So cancelling barium on Friday because nausea/reflux is gone. I'm just left with MASSIVE hunger. I've never been this hungry whilst having the band. I cannot get in for a fill until July 7th (ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh) so the next 12 days are going to be a challenge. I am so so so so hungry! But starting the walking again tomorrow so that will help. I dont want to put on ANY weight. I want to at least stay the same but going to try and lose.
Since using the progesterone based cream for my acne, my skin has gotten a lot better. I wish I had taken before and after photos but I didnt. I can't wait to see the outcome in a week or two, hopefully skin will be completely clear!
I am a little paranoid now about no restriction. My little safety net of no hunger is gone. Its a little scary! It's a little bump in my journey, I will get through it. I am determined to get to my birthday goal.

-skinny "little worried" biddy :0)

Went to the Doctors and The Doctor Said.....

So I couldn't get in to see my surgeon yesterday. So I spent the day in bed doing tafe work. I had reflux until about midday then it went away. I've felt nauseous ever since.
I went to see him this afternoon (boss was super happy about that). I have to have a barium on Friday if I don't feel any better. Then Dr will let me know whats up with Barbie. Dr wanted me to have a fill on Monday, but there are no appointments avaliable for two weeks! It's going to be a tough two weeks guy, I am really going to need your support! I cannot fall of the wagon!

I have lost 3 kilos in the last 2 weeks from being sick. Dr didn't like that, I did! I am so close to getting to my goal for my 21st, this next two weeks will be a hurdle I am determined to get over. Not only NOT put on weight, but lose!

Thankyou so much everyone for the comments. Really appreciated it!
Staff at work noticed I've lost weight. I would hope so, I've lost 18 kilos!!! Can't wait for the next two (20 kilos lost omg!!), then 3.1 (99.9!)
Myf wrote a beautiful comment on a recent post of mine about how I need to start living my life now, no wait until a certain weight. I think I am doing that in most aspects of my life. I am being more assertive in work situations and I also have more confidence. Only thing I'm still wary of is the guy thing but I think I am slowly getting there.

Promise to write a longer post in the next few days detailing whats going on band wise and life wise. Still would love tips from all about how to get to my goal, food that is really band friendly and healthy and any exercise tips! So close to my goal! Bring it on!!!

-skinny "postive" biddy :0)

Slipped Band?

Off to Doctors first thing in the morning, I think I might have a band slip. I am suffering from reflux and I'm constantly starving. You know when you can just tell that something isnt right??? Something doesn't feel right. So I've taken day off to double check.....I hope that I am wrong. Please be wrong....


-bridget

More fill?

I am not sure if I want to get more fill or not. I feel like I am eating a little too much and that I am a little over control over my food.

B- 3 cruskits with cheese and sweet mustard pickles
L- sweet thai chicken wrap

I am thinking maybe another little fill just to take the edge off the food.
Back into walking on Thursday. I am actually pretty excited!
Any tips to shed these last few kilos til im under 100 would be GREATLY appreciated.


-skinny biddy :0)