Friday, June 26, 2009

The Learning Of Bridget Parker

What a the end of the first half of the year approaches, I've realised my journey is far from over. For some reason I thought that with my weight issues being somewhat resolved life would sail smoothly from there. I didn't realise the journey would continue, that this is the process called life. Learning. Living. Loving.
Learning- not only learning about my new self, my growing self.... but starting uni to study for a new career.
Living- having hopes and dreams.....
Loving- loving..... something I've not experienced on this level before. Love of myself, and love of another person. Someone in this world loves me, loves me for everything I am, every imperfection, every body hang up I have, everything I told myself someone wouldnt love about me. I spent the last 6 years with a wall up. Convinced myself that the only person I needed to love was myself. I became Miss Independent, shut out everyone and focused on myself. Not a bad thing, but not something I could keep up forever. Those three words were spoken and the wall went down. And life turned upside down. And I'm learning to adjust to this new life, these new emotions. I didnt realise love was so so powerful. That it could have this power over you. Coming to someone who is a control freak its a very weird thing. And I've spent weeks trying to get a grip on it then realising this week- let it go, let it flow.
I'm past the stage of blogging about what I eat. Who cares. Food is food- its only there for me nutritionally now. I have no interest in it as a comfort.
I started walking again yesterday after a few months off. I am planning to enter the city to surf this year with my dad!
My sister called last night AND APOLOGISED to me..... we talked, I accepted her apology.... I was sure to tell her that I would never talk to her again if she was to do anything like that to me once more. It feels good. I'm hesitant naturally, but feeling good.
I put in for a week of mid July. I am going to see my bestest bestest bestest friend Tegan (love you!) with my guy. He suggested it :0) I cannot wait! I hate hate hate my job right now. I need a break! Im contemplating actually trying to find something else- anyone wanna offer me a job? Lol....
Have a great weekend guys. I have zilch plans which sucks (Im finding that Im in a transitioning stage of friends once again and I'm left with no one.....) but I'll study and have some sleeeeep!


Anonymous said...

Did you think that transitioning friends is a good thing? Friends are generally for life...whats the cause of the transition??? Maybe think hard about that

Good Luck

Melanie said...

Hey I think you sound slike you're on the right track - you're in a matamorphosis phase and the butterfly is in the process of emerging - good on you.

Tegan (THE BESTEST FRIEND) said...

so miss anonymous, I'm assuming you were one if the friends that has been transitioned? you don't have the guts to say who you are but you're happy enough to criticise MY best friend on her life choices! you were obviously transitioned and rightly deserved to have been.

get a life, seriously.
jealousy can only take you so far!