Tuesday Rant...

These days I don't know what to write.... so please bare with me as I try. I can understand how some people forget to blog after a certain amount of time after banding. Life changes and the band doesn't become number 1.
I've started to notice I'm respecting my body more. I'm a fairly pale gal. I've started to fake tan myself (lol) and also get some more sun. I stayed outta the sun because sun=heat, which means less clothes. Which means more body parts being exposed. I am treating myself Thursday and Friday to a massage, some beauty treatments and getting my nails done ($30 for a full set omg how cheap!)
After tomorrow I have 5 days off!! Super groovy! Taking it easy. Seeing friends and studying.
My uncle has gotten worse. He cant stay at home and he cant stay in the hospital. The hospital can't do anything else for him. So its a really difficult situation.
I've made an effort to aviod lots of carbs. I tend to grab them for lunch or dinner as my body craves them (since I have PCOS). Trying to get more protien and veg as I was concerned about my intake.
Today for lunch I took leftover apricot chicken. I nearly pbed it. I had to leave the room. Havent had issues at work before. It wasnt fun. I was trying to make 14 beds and having a stuck... not fun.

Off now... can't wait til this time tomorrow!

-skinny biddy

Weird

Hey guys,
So still no wireless for me... using the parents computer. Hopefully will format it today. I miss not being able to come on here late at night.
So I've been really confused lately at my state of mind. Ever since my 6 months month bandiversary things seemed to have changed. I am not thinking about my weight all the time. I am not super focused on it or motivated. I am not sure if this is a good thing or not. It feels like that super high that I was on has gone and I'm back to my new life.... get what I'm trying to say? I am having real trouble expressing what I mean!
I had the goal of losing 20 kilos in 24 weeks. But now I'm sorta over it. I of course want to lose more weight, as much as possible. But I just dont have the energy to put into it. I will still make sure I am eating right and going to the gym 3 times a week. But its not going to be on the forefront of my mind. Does that mean that its now become a lifestyle change that I have become used to??? That its now as routine as brushing my teeth?? I think I'm onto something here!
Yesterday I went to my friend Bec's wedding. It was so so so beautiful. We work together and she is going on her honeymoon tomorrow for a month to America. I am going to be so selfish and say that I am going to miss her so much! She makes me sane at work sometimes. I am hoping that work wont be stressful with her gone. We have a casual coming in so I will have to take on extra stuff.
On the love note.... CONGRATS MYF!!! So so so so so happy for you!! I knew that it was going to happen!
Restriction wise, band is having good and bad days. I'm just riding the wave and taking each day as it comes. Tomorrow I will post a food diary.
This week I'm hitting the gym Tuesday,Thursday and Saturday. Didn't go at all last week. Just didnt feel motivated after my yukky family issues. Will be hitting it though this week.
After talking to Kristie last night I have been thinking I need to change my goal from a goal weight to a goal size. Scales havent shifted for a few weeks but I've lost 3 cms off my waist. I am over getting on the scales all the time. It's not doing it for me anymore. I'm getting more joy from seeing the changes in the mirror.

Hope you had a nice weekend. Weather is amazing!

-skinny biddy :0)

I'm back!

Hey guys,

So its been interesting times in Bridget Land since I blogged last. Lots to write about so please forgive me for the long blog!
Friday I had my 6 month banding review. Surgeon was very happy with my results so far. I've lost 42% of my excess body weight. 25 kilos gone! Surgeon asked me about talking at an info session. So I will be at some stage. Not sure when.
Saturday and Sunday I did am "introduction to spirituality" course. It was amazing. I am doing the advanced course in a month and looking forward to it a great deal. I really feel like I've opened up a new door in my life with this one. I was so relaxed coming home Saturday- that night we got a call to say my uncle (dads brother) is in hospital. He has diabetes and liver failure. So that was really hard to hear. Then Sunday I came home, once again relaxed- only to walk in the door and 30 seconds later be told my sister was moving to Perth the next day. It was her 18th Sunday. She moved over there with her bf on Monday morning at 6am. It was such a shock. I took Monday off work because I was just so upset. I still am. I walk past her room and still think she is there. I havent gone into detail on here about my family troubles out of respect, but my sister has mental health issues and has really put us through our paces. It has been more peaceful since shes been gone, but empty also...
So Monday I didnt go to work- instead I went to the hosiptal with mum and dad to see my uncle. Going back to work on Tuesday was difficult. I found it hard to be bubbly and happy like I am meant to working with children. But by the end of the day I felt better.
I have had a sinus headache since Saturday. Having issues the last two days with restriction- everything is getting stuck. So tablets arent gonna work. Im not looking forward to working tomorrow with the kiddies with this blinder. Lights off etc!
Weight wise I've decided no more daily weigh ins. I was beating myself up about the number on the scales too much. So every Wednesday I will weigh in and take it from there. I guess I have also lost a little motivation this week with all the goings on and really not feeling like my normal self. Hopefully she'll return soon.

Thats all for now. Head killing me....

bridget

I'm not dead

Still no net.... Got new modem but having issues setting it up. Lots to tell u but will leave it til u can use laptop.
Missing blogging so much. Had some huge shocks over weekend and would have liked the support.
Talk soon
Bridget

Internet withdrawals!

hi guys,
My net is down atm so haven't been able to get on. Using my iPhone atm so it's hard 2 type. Have my 6 month review in a few hrs. Will get a small fill also. Will hopefully be back online by next week- modem stuffed :0(
Have a brilliant weekend- I'll be at a spirituality course!
Love skinny 'noooo I need the net!' biddy

Insert Witty Title Here.... Cause I Am Too Tired

Hey Guys,

I forgot to tell you on Thursday something cool that happend to me. My friend is getting married in a few weeks and I wanted something nice to wear of course. There is a really nice green top in Autograph I thought would be nice. So I tried it on. In a 16.. yeah, um it didn't fit! I was super stoked BUT annoyed because I really wanted that top! Lol. I did buy another one that was on special for $8 for work. It is a little loose on me but I can deal. So it's safe for me to say I don't need that store anymore. I could probably buy one or two things there, but I would be a little on the big side. Might go look at jeans though. I did a huge cleanout on Friday (thought it was fitting since it was my 6 month bandiversary) and got rid of a huge garbage bag of clothes. So I am now left with barely anything that actually fits... moreso clothes that are a little loose.
I've been a little frustrated with good old scales. I am stuck atm. I've been thinking it over and have decided to push on with more exercise. AT LEAST 5 TIMES A WEEK. So this week here is the plan:

1. Monday- gym
2. Tuesday- pilates at home
3. Wednesday- gym
4. Thursday- pilates at home
5. Friday- gym

I wanna give it my all. I want to know that I have done the best job I can possibly do at reaching my long term and short term goals. I will not look back on this time with regret. Where did this motivation come from? No fucken idea to be perfectly honest with you. But whatever angel is out there looking out for me I owe you.
Got to meet Nikki yesterday. Shes a sweetheart. I know we will be good friends. Hopefully she can come to gym with me and I can have a gym buddy. Always good to have people to keep you motivated. I definately know that having a blog about my journey has made a difference. I was thinking about it last night and I felt weird pondering the idea of me never having one. I wouldn't have been as inspired and motivated. I don't think I would have lost what I have.

All from me tonight. Tired after a long day.
Don't forget to check out my photo gallery (http://bridgetparkerphotogallery.blogspot.com) and see the new piccies that are up.

-skinny biddy :0)

6 months banded today.... a re cap

Well.... I don't know what to write.


I have all these amazing feels today, like every other day lately. And I've blogged about them a lot. Right now, in this moment, I cannot condense them into words. They are bigger than that. All I can say is I am super proud of myself.
I took photos today in celebration of my efforts. Lol. I also weighed in at 96.4.... 400 grams away from my goal which was 25 lost by my six months. I can't complain with that.
Tomorrow Mum and I are going to get manis and pedis in celebration. I want to do something special for myself. I deserve it.
So I guess now its phase 2 for me. Now it's time to really put my head down and focus. The rest of the weight isn't gonna slide off like it seems to has. My goals for the next six months are as follows:

• exercise AT LEAST three times a week at the gym
• pilates AT LEAST once a week at home
• tell myself everyday that I am worth this, that I deserve the best me I can be
• not obsess over scales and the grams i may or may not have lost
• consciously make sure each day I am eating the best that I can
• and finally.... I want to lose 20 kilos in the next 6 months.... thats 24 weeks to lose 20 kilos. I think that this is honestly possible. IF I WORK HARD.

Thankyou to all those people who have been reading for the last 6 months. I know that there is a fair few of you who don't post comments but still follow my journey. For those of you I say thanks.
Thankyou to the people who comment. I do appreciate it and look forward to reading what you have said.

Here's to the next 6 months guys!

-skinny "gonna lose that 20" biddy :0)

Smiling

Hey guys,

I had a busy day today. I was still exhausted from my silly weekend late nights trying to finish assignments. So I had a sleep in, making me late for everything else I needed to do in the day. But screw it. I wanted sleep! Lol.
I hit the gym (only 45 as I had to go to the Tax bitch), went to see who I will refer to as "the tax bitch" who is so rude to me. Yes, I stuffed up my tax for my business, but it isnt the end of the world. It can all be fixed. Apparently if I don't fix it soon she thinks I will have to go to court. Mum just rolled her eyes. Shes an old woman who has had enough with her work and told me how fed up she is of doing this. I stood up for myself when she was having a go at me, I wasnt going to take her bullshit. Normally I would have been super sweet and "yes miss". But no. I was strong.
Got an iphone today. I got an awesome plan and I'll be saving money with a nice phone!! Happy chappy!
I also went into "autograph" today. I need something to wear to a friends wedding in a few weeks. There was this nice green top I thought I might try on. Bugger, didn't fit. It was too big- smallest size. Sweet! I did fit into this nice cheap $8.95 top so I bought that to wear out and about. I'm once again going to have to do a sort through of clothes as some are making me look bigger than I am. This is expensive! Lol.
Enjoying the lovely weather we are having at the moment. It's making me super excited about summer. I usually dread it because it means I'm usually super hot and have to wear less clothes. No issues this year. I know I'm gonna love love love it!
Had to get links taken out of the awesome watch the parents gave me for my 21st. It fit me when I tried it on about 4 months ago. When I got it on my birthday it was way too big. Was great to have that feeling.

Tomorrow will be my 6 months bandiversary. I think I am going to treat myself to a mani and a pedi. Its a very important day to me. I will leave the reflective post until tomorrow....
Off to do my programming for craft at work next week. I'm doing spring theme so in the process of organising a garden for the kiddies to make on our wall!

-bridget :0)

Take a Look See...

Checked out my weight loss ticket recently? See how the number's are close to evening out?? A few kilos time and I will have lost over half my excess body weight! It'll be good to be on the other side of those numbers!!
This morning is sat on 96.8 kilos on scales... I've lost almost a kilo in 3 days. Gotta love the exercise!
On Friday, it will be my 6 months banded. I'm going to do something special for myself to celebrate. I'm very excited!! If I can try and lose 1.3 kilos by Friday, I would have lost half of excess weight in 6 months..... 1.3 might be a little much... I'll work hard and see what happens...
6 month banding review is on the 18th September. I was planning to have lost the 50% by then. I can see that as being reality!!! In order though for me to be under, I need to be 93.5 as their scales are 2 kilos heavier. 3.3 kilos in 2 weeks..... hmmm.... I'll see.

Have a super Sunday

-skinny "soooo close" biddy :0)

Stormy Saturday!!!

I can't believe it! I actually woke up this morning and braved the crazy weather and went to the gym. I did wake up late, and as a result was only able to do 45 mins (they close early on weekends). But hey, at least I did it, right!
Tomorrow is a big day. Father's Day of course, but more so I am going to Sydney to see my relatives I haven't seen since before my banding surgery- some for over a year. Crazy! They have a catered lunch for my Aunty's 60th Birthday. So I am not sure what to do, its meats and salads. Me and those two foods aren't friends. I think I will take something else just in case. The worst possible thing would be for me to have a PB there. I'll have enough eyes on me at the table.
My lappy is being a complete bitch at the moment. I have no internet so using the old school home one. I am getting all stressed and panic striken.
That's all for now. I'm gonna try de-stress and do some tafe work.


-bridget


Update..... lappy now working... but its telling me I'm offline.... must be pmsing....

That's Right- Uh huh!

I did it!
I woke up this morning and thought "mmmm...maybe I'll just do treadmill at home" and went back to sleep. An hour later I woke up, got on scales and decided to take hold. No more excuses Bridget Parker. You gotta do it. So I didn't think about it anymore. I got in car and went to the gym.
I did:
20 mins treadmill
20 mins bike
20 mins elliptical trainer

1 hour guys!! Woo!

Tonight everyone at home is getting takeaway. Usually I just follow the trend and get it to. Decided not too. I'm not going to ruin my hardwork today on it. I'm worth more.

-skinny "proud" biddy :0)

Daaaaamn!

Go home from work in a pretty good mood- only to find that after almost 6 months I get the bill from the anaethesist. I thought I'd gotten away with not having to pay. So I gotta cough up like $226. Great.
I'm currently 97.8 on the scales. Pretty happy with that. I still get scared everytime I hop on that it will be over 100. That was a tough cookie to break!
Since I am not currently suffering any sickness I WILL be going to the gym tomorrow. Just a light one to start off since its been over 6 months off. 15 mins treadmill, 15 mins bike, 15 mins elliptical trainer.
Thats all tonight... will post when I get back from gym. I am totally going. No excuses. Sami has really helped me kick my butt into gear!

-bridget :0)

Not Happening

So yeah.... no date.
After finding out a little more about him I've decided he isn't right for me.
He is suffering depression at the moment. I CANNOT deal with that. I have just myself gotten outta a really bad time mentally and I will not let myself get dragged down by someone else's negativity.
I've realised now though what I want in a man. I want someone who makes me laugh. If you can't make me laugh don't bother because its the most important thing to make. I want someone who is positive, outgoing and confident. I know that I am super shy with guys so someone who is outgoing and confident will make me feel more at ease in the beginning. I want someone who is deep. Someone who I can have super serious conversations with- the ones that time stops for and you get this buzz from when you are listening to them talking so passionately. I want someone older than me. Because I think I'm pretty mature for my 21 years old age. Guys my age don't get me. I want a man.
Seems like a lot of wants. Seems very very picky. But I don't want a lotta "maybes" along the way.
Loving facebook at the moment... there is an application I am addicted to called "Social Me". You look at a photo of someone and "tag it" eg :sweet, cute. I've gotten some cool responses on my photo. My fave happened tonight though. Some random dude who I will never meet, never have a conversation with tagged me as "PROUD". I don't really need to say this to any of you.... I think you know that it was a special moment for me. And without him knowing he made me stop, think, appreciate and smile. Because yes, I am proud.

Thought I'd give you a food diary.
B- cup of tea
S- three cashews (busy day lol no time)
L- light strawberry yoghurt, 4 cruskits with spaghetti on (yummo!)
D- McCains Pizza
D- chocolate

Ok so night time were shitty choices. This is actually the most I've eaten in days. I am feeling a lot better now. That were arse lump in my throat is gone. I have no idea what is was. But I swear my body knows a weekend is coming and finds something to make me sick. So no one mention the "W" word to me. Lol.
Scales are 97.8 or something. I am trying not to focus on it though. It's just a number. It doesn't sum up the joy that I feel at my accomplishments in my self esteem and confidence in 6 months. Such a short time- such a huge impact!

Thats all tonight. Hope everyone is well and happy.

If you want to be happy, be. ~Leo Tolstoy

-skinny biddy :0)

Wow....

Bridget thinks she has a date on Saturday..... FIRST DATE. Fuck man.

Ok.... story is that I havent met the guy. Met him online. We are planning to go to the movies on Saturday. I'm not sure 100% if you can classify that as a date....???

-bridget :0)

Ummm ok?

Hey guys,
Thanks for the comments.
Today I decided not to call the Dr, to see how I went with food today. I didn't really have any issues. Made sure I was chew chew chewing and such. I think it could be my tonsils.
I'm going to go down the path of "why does it always happen to me, I'm always sick". I'm just going to move on. I will go get some meds in a few days if it hasn't gone away.
I will take on board what everyone has said. I think the horrible lip thing was because I started to take vitamin c chewable tablets. Trying to do the right thing with that and I get plagued with unkissable lips! (Not that I've got anyone to kiss, I might soon though....have to wait and see what happens with a certain guy)
Had a great day at work. Mondays and Tuesdays are super relaxed. Wednesdays are my horror days that I dread. I have two children who won't leave my side and scream my ear drums off and cry. I almost got peed on last Wednesday....
I might forget to say it before the big day, so Myf, have a wonderful trip away. You deserve to have the best time. I am so proud of you and what you've accomplished in such a short space of time. I always appreciate the advice you give me. Can't wait to see piccys of your amazing trip when you get back!

Love to all,
-skinny "always drama in the heath field" biddy :0)